I can't do it all by myself

No, I'm not talking about my husband not helping me around the house. He does help me out when I demand ask him to. I'm talking about me trying to live my life without God's help.

God had to get me to this point in my life for me to realize just how much I need Him. Sure, during tragedies and disappointments, I've needed Him. It's easy to see how much I need Him during those times. What I'm learning now is how much I need Him everyday.

Leading up to my last days on my job I thought that I was about to have it made. No more getting up at 5:30 every morning. No more feeling rushed to get dinner fed to my family before starting the cycle over again the next day. I thought now that I was going to be a stay at home mom, my life was going to be easy.

Lately it was seeming as though I was struggling with everything. Every time I had to do the dishes or laundry I felt like I was having to put forth all of my effort just to do a simple five minute task. It was taking everything I had just to make it through each day. During one of my woe is me pity parties, I realized that I'm not letting God truly lead my life. I'm not supposed to do all this on my own. In John 15:5 Jesus says "for without Me you can do nothing." 2 Corinthians 12:9 tells us that God's grace is sufficient for us, and His strength is made perfect in our weakness. I was trying to do everything in my own strength instead of relying on God's strength for me each day. I need Him everyday in everything I do in order to be a good wife and mother.

I'm learning a lot during this time in my life. I feel like I've grown more spiritually in the past six months than I have in the past few years. Now that I'm not so busy, I've been able to do a lot of self examining and I'm more open to hearing what God has to say about me. His lessons are not fun during the learning process, but I'm thankful that He loves me enough to keep teaching me.